A Round-About Way to a Nervous Breakdown

Yesterday started off normal enough.  However, those of us with a little highway behind us  know all too well that normal can go all “pear shaped” very quickly.  Actually, in my case “all circular” but let me start from the beginning before I have you thoroughly confused.

ACT ONE

A couple of months ago I bought an excellent book called Platform: Get Noticed in a Noisy World by Michael Hyatt.  This is an excellent roadmap for those seeking to increase theirPlatform: Get Noticed in a Noisy World visibility by building an online presence and I highly recommend it.

Shortly afterward, I learned Michael was going to be speaking at a fairly new venue in my home town of Fort Worth.  The facility which hosted the event is called the Cendera Center and is located on a very busy traffic circle.

I brought my copy of Platform to the presentation and made some notes in the margins as Michael spoke.  After the event, I returned to my car, hung up my sport coat, got a few things organized, jumped in my car and headed to lunch.  As I entered the “round-about” as the British like to innocently call these circles of death, I glanced in the rear-view mirror just in time to see an object sliding from the roof of my car onto the trunk.  You have probably guessed by now that the mysterious object was my copy of Platform which I had inadvertently left on my car’s roof when I drove off.

I thought I might be able to exit the circle before the book took the final plunge to the pavement below but no such luck.  I can promise you that centrifugal force is still alive and

Traffic Circle

Not the Benbrook Traffic Circle. Just felt that way!

well on the Benbrook Traffic Circle.   As soon as the book dropped to the ground, I threw on my brakes, threw my car into reverse, backed over the book with my right front tire, put my car in park, jumped out and retrieved the book.   Rest assured that all of these steps took less time than it takes to describe them.  They were also accompanied by the sound of blaring horns and drivers flashing single digits at me which I suppose was their way of indicating their IQ.

With my heart still pounding, I drove to La Madeleine for a quiet lunch where I could hopefully regain my composure.  Sad to say, though, my personal Greek Tragedy was only at the end of Act One.

ACT TWO

As I started to enter the restaurant, I realized I didn’t have my cell phone.  Like one of those whirling dervishes out of India, I tore through all my belongings to see if I could find the phone in my car but to no avail.

At that moment a very ominous thought crossed my mind.  I said to myself, “Self, you don’t suppose you placed your phone on top of the book?”  I instantly conjured up the image of my beloved iPhone lying in the middle of Benbrook Traffic Circle being pummeled by a Coors beer delivery truck.  I jumped back in my car, sped back to the scene of Act One filled with mortal dread.  However, after making a couple of circles, the phone was no where to be found.

I pulled back into the Cendera parking lot scouring the lot for the remains of what had once been my trusted personal assistant but nary a phone in sight.  I pulled into the same space where I originally parked, exited my car and took a few deep breaths while uttering a quick prayer to Steve Jobs, the new patron saint of cell phones.  I decided to give the interior one more search and to my utter amazement my prodigal phone was hiding under the front driver’s seat.  Unless you have ever misplaced a smart phone, you have no idea the childlike giddiness and sense of relief its discovery can produce!

Hopefully this fiasco was not captured by anyone on their cell phone camera but in this day and age, you can never be sure.  Just in case, you might want to keep an eye out on YouTube.  If it is there, I have no doubt it has gone viral by now.

4 thoughts on “A Round-About Way to a Nervous Breakdown

  1. Clearly the answer to your poll is # 2 … as I can see myself experiencing a thrilling adventure such as yours someday soon. May your trips around the Benbrook Traffic Circle be safe.

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